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Monday, Nov. 25, 2002/6:18 PM

Duk's Arse

"Duk tail" or "Cock-tale"

The 'Rock Island Line' may well be a mighty fine line but I bet you didn't know that it was only because of Duk that Johnny Cash decided to sing about the 'Rock Island Line'.

In those days Duk travelled extensively with celebrities such as Johnny Cash, Little Richard, Lonnie Donegan and Tom Jones (Another 'little known fact' is that Duk taught this song to each and every one of them).

The ONLY reason this railroad is celebrated is because of the fabulous drinks that Duk mixed up in the refreshment car. If you listen to the lyrics you soon discover, not only a reference to Duk himself but also the real reason for the song in the first place.

"He may be right and he may be wrong. But you gonna miss him when he's gone. The conductor said before he died. There is only one more drink that he'd like to try. The Mallard said what could it be Vanilla Vodka and Ginger tea?"

There is a little bit of creative licence on the lyricist's part. Duk recommends using Ginger Ale rather than tea when making "Duk's Tastiest Drink in the Whole Wide World".

The accusations of the }:> are completely unfounded. We are already consulting with our lawyers regarding the accusation that Duk revises history in his favour.

In the words of the 'Jesus Action Figure'. "Let he who is without sin cast out the first rock pool"

Duk's back/ Duk's forward